There are a lot of skills and important abilities which are not accounted for by the mere IQ.
What is it that enables us to behave in appropriate ways at the right time? Why are some people able to focus and concentrate under pressure? What type of intelligence gives us communication skills and helps us to connect with others? All of these skills are enormously important, yet can’t be explained by one’s mere IQ level.
The necessity of these skills shows that the traditional IQ needs to be complemented by 3 other types of “intelligences”: relational intelligence, emotional intelligence and team intelligence. Unlike the traditional IQ, these can be learned over time, and even improved, so should be practiced every day. These 3 types of intelligences will improve the way we work, and transform the methods in which we interact with others (both at work and at home). Learn to master these three intelligences, and you will be on the road to efficiency, professionalism and better relationships.
1. Relational Intelligence
Whether you’re distracted by a fellow colleague at work, or your mind is wondering rather than engaging on a conversation; you’re lacking relational intelligence! According to Jeremie Kubicek, author of the book 5 Gears, “relational intelligence is the ability to connect and be present in the midst of tasks.” This is achieved by paying attention to our “five gears” which we go through day after day:
- Focus mode
- Task mode
- Social mode
- Connect mode
- Recharge mode
According to Kubicek, relational intelligence is achieved when these gears are consciously activated at the appropriate times. Here are a few tips to appropriately shift from one to the other:
We all have one gear we tend to become trapped within. Identifying yours is the first step to improving your relational intelligence.
Choose Your Switch Place
In order to be in the right gear at the right time, make physical points of reference which illustrate when make the “switch”. For example, a landmark on your return commute may act as your signal to switch from task mode to connect mode. This landmark may remind you to disengage from work, so you can return to the present moment and be prepared to engage with family or housemates (and yourself!).
Recognise The Value of The Present
Aspiring to be present is the first step to becoming mindful and focused. Have you been interrupted while reading this very post? Saying “no” to interruptions or postponing a task is not only acceptable, but also often necessary. Avoiding distractions is important, as it is what allows us to fully engage with others and efficiently focus on what’s in front of us.
“Aspiring to be present is the first step to becoming mindful and focused.“
2. Emotional Intelligence
What is emotional intelligence? Emotional intelligence offers the opportunity to hold a constructive conversation with someone as a way to deal with the daily emotional weight. Most people don’t realise the great extent to which emotions affect themselves, their behaviour and those around them. Here are three ways to becoming aware of your emotions and managing them effectively.
Accept Your Emotions
Rather than going ahead and expressing your rampant emotions, the first step is to acknowledge them, and secondly, accept them. These first steps allow for better emotional management. All of us are guilty of being unaware of how we feel, or failing to understanding why we feel a certain way. Practicing 10 minutes of daily mindfulness allows for self-engagement and promotes a healthy relationship with oneself. Take the time to check in!
Have you ever tried holding back your emotions, or hiding them from others? What were the results? Usually, being passive about an emotion and keeping it to yourself eventually leads to the emotion erupting out— often to the wrong person, at the wrong time, and in the worst possible way. Being assertive is about expressing your emotions in a factual way so the issue can be managed in a timely and efficient manner. Remember to be constructive when exposing a problem – always come up with a potential solution!
Accept The Emotion of Others
Another aspect of being emotionally intelligent is being able to effectively respond to others’ emotions. Just as with your own, you need to be accepting of other’s feelings too. It’s also important to be aware that your words and actions affect other people, so try to learn from their feedback. Most of all, respect their emotions and thank them for sharing.
“Just remember to be constructive when exposing a problem – always come up with a potential solution!“
3. Team Intelligence
A good team is not just the sum of skilled people, but rather, the collective ability to function and tackle complex situations together. This is referred to as team intelligence. You may have a collection of very bright and talented members, but if they don’t know how to perform as a team, then they cannot achieve the efficiency, creativity and problem-solving abilities of a good team. Here are three tips to building an intelligent team:
An open environment where people’s ideas and opinions are welcome will allow team members to share and participate more easily in discussions and meetings. “Speaking turns” is a great tool to make sure more extroverted personalities don’t dominate the whole conversation.
Good non-verbal communication skills and empathy will equip the team with consciousness of each other’s emotions and opinions.
Today, a lot of teams operate through technological communication such as email, which increases the risk of miscommunication and quiproquo – all the more reasons to develop team intelligence.
“A good team is not just the sum of skilled people, but rather, the collective ability to function and tackle complex situations together.“
Altogether, the “three intelligences” will empower the team and improve collective performance. There are several tools which complement this efficient tripod, such as positive communication, mindfulness, intercultural intelligence, plus many more strategies.